Of course without committing a crime before and without saying anything else.

    • yanyuan@lemmy.worldOP
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      Good question. There are probably some constellations where the police would be like: We got plenty of matching testimonies for you. We charge you and this could send you to jail for 80 years or you pleat guilty and accept 5 years.

      On the other hand, I think in Germany you could be charged with pretending to have committed a crime.

      Criminal Code (StGB) § Section 145d Pretending to have committed a criminal offense

      (1) Any person who, contrary to his better knowledge, pretends to an authority or to a body competent to receive reports that an unlawful act has been committed […] shall be liable to a custodial sentence not exceeding three years or to a monetary penalty […].

      • vzq@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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        That’s just filling a false report. That’s illegal almost anywhere, but you need to be more specific than what’s in the post.

      • Feathercrown@lemmy.world
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        submit report saying I violated this law

        instant “this sentence is false”-style paradox

        legal system implodes. Complete anarchy takes over

        • yanyuan@lemmy.worldOP
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          :D If this thread reaches the wrong people, society as we know it will end! What have we done!?

  • foo@withachanceof.com
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    Non-snarky answer: My guess is that after not answering any questions they’d assume you’re just trying to waste their time and tell you to leave or actually be arrested for trespassing.

      • Carighan Maconar@lemmy.world
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        I looked around, and I think it depends heavily on where in the world you are. Over here I think only calling emergency numbers knowingly in error is a crime, but there are provisions that in extreme cases you could be held partially liable for someone else’s harm if you are actively wasting the time of the police or the firefighters.

        • Big P@feddit.uk
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          In the UK it is against the law to waste police time, since we don’t have a 5th amendment equivalent you would probably just get instantly hit with that if you tried this and didn’t leave when told to

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    I live in New Zealand so me rambling about “the fifth” would probably make them call Social Services to come and help me since I would seem to be suffering from a mental health event.

    Either that or they would think I was trolling and send me on my way with a stern reminder that wasting police time is a criminal offence.

    • Ilovethebomb@lemm.ee
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      I’ve seen videos filmed in NZ of people ranting about their constitutional rights.

      You’re right though, they’d assume you’re either a nutter or a troll.

      • livus@kbin.social
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        @Ilovethebomb yeah I met a “Trump supporter” here in NZ once. If we have a lot of them, it’s probably an indication that we’re underfunding mental health and education.

      • Deceptichum@kbin.social
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        Well they do have rights, it’s just their constitution is not one singular document. Kinda like us in Australia with our “implied rights”.

        But yeah anyone going on about them is most likely the ‘Sovereign Citizens’ sort. Dunno how the fuck that concept has spread around the world so much.

    • andrewta@lemmy.world
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      So New Zealand doesn’t have a concept of the courts can’t make you testify against yourself? That surprises me.

      • livus@kbin.social
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        Of course we do.

        But it derives from common law via the New Zealand Bill of Rights and has nothing whatsoever to do with the US Constitution’s amendments.

        • andrewta@lemmy.world
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          Thank you for helping to prove my point. When the OP was saying take the fifth he was talking in a genetic way. In other words walking into the police station and taking that countries variation of the fifth. He just didn’t bother typing it fully out like that because it was obvious what his point was. It’s obvious that new Zealand doesn’t have the literal fifth amendment but they have the equivalent of it. Again thank you for helping to prove my point.

          When I asked “doesn’t new Zealand have that concept” I new they did. I was trying to get you to understand what the op was trying to say.

      • Shambling Shapes@lemmy.one
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        “The fifth” is American. They have the same or similar concept in other countries, they just have different names for it than “the fifth amendment”.

        Plead “the fifth” in NZ and they’ll tell you that you watch too much American television.

        • andrewta@lemmy.world
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          I know that. I was trying to get him to understand that the op was talking in a generic sense. Both op and myself realize that new Zealand has an equivalent concept of the fifth. Op wasn’t trying to say walk in and literally say “plead the fifth” but walk in and do the equivalent of that.

          People get way to literal when they don’t need to be.

          • yanyuan@lemmy.worldOP
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            You’re right. I thought everyone here knows “the 5th” and it’s just shorter than “the right to remain silent”. However, most people seem to have got the right idea.

  • crispy_kilt@feddit.de
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    They’d probably call social services or a doctor because someone going on about a “fifth amendment” in Switzerland is clearly in need of medical attention

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      I once read about a man who was arrested in (I think) either Serbia or Croatia who told the police that he was taking the “fifth amendment” because he’d seen that on TV in a dubbed American show and thought he could do that there too.

      ETA: And many people in German-speaking countries think that if you get arrested by police in a German-speaking country, you are read a translated Miranda warning: “Sie haben das Recht zu schweigen. Alles, was Sie sagen, kann vor Gericht gegen Sie verwendet werden. Sie haben das Recht auf einen Anwalt. Wenn Sie sich keinen Anwalt leisten können, wird Ihnen vom Gericht einer zugeteilt.”

  • neptune@dmv.social
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    They’d probably search the database for anyone wanted of your name/description. And when it came back blank they’d probably leave you in a room for a few hours to see if anything happens. And then let you go.

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    Without any crime to suspect you of, they might detain you and question you. It’s not uncommon for people to turn themselves in for crimes, and there are legitimate reasons to do so especially with a lawyer, namely to get out on bail easier, avoid having the police raid your home or place of work, and perhaps used to sway the prosecution for a more favorable sentencing, but if the police have no clue what to even charge you for and they can’t figure one out, they’ll just be confused and frustrated, which is a dangerous combination for police

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    the fifth ? are you sure ? it’s a little old-school, evokes holy music… I would go for the third and the seventh instead, just to shake things up. Cops aren’t used to daring chords like these, you’d totally destabilize them and they wouldn’t be able to jail you

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    The officer would likely look up, tell you to get out, and go back to their work unless there was some obvious reason to arrest you.

    Unless they felt like issuing a fine of some type for wasting their time.

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    If you turn yourself in you forfiet your personal belongings. They’d check your ID and see that you have no warrants and tell you to fuck off