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The Picard Maneuver@startrek.websiteM to Lemmy Shitpost@lemmy.world · 2 years ago

Timmy, this is wrong

startrek.website

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Timmy, this is wrong

startrek.website

The Picard Maneuver@startrek.websiteM to Lemmy Shitpost@lemmy.world · 2 years ago
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  • Dharma Curious@startrek.website
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    2 years ago

    I mean, realistically, if everyone was addicted to crack, literally everyone, it wouldn’t be that different. Crack would be way more available, likely with like, crack restaurants and shit. Poor people would basically crack-starve the way they food starve now. Same shit, different day. Except now we know the governmental officials are high as fuck, instead of just suspecting as much.

    And I imagine my house would be cleaner. Zip zip zip.

    • GBU_28@lemm.ee
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      2 years ago

      If it happened all at once, but crack supply didn’t also grow at the same instant, a lot of people would be crashing in a few hours

      • Donkter@lemmy.world
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        2 years ago

        Realistically almost everyone would have a bad year and a lot of recovered crackheads would relapse.

    • sigh@lemmy.world
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      2 years ago

      I mean, realistically, if everyone was addicted to crack, literally everyone, it wouldn’t be that different.

      there would be signs

      • Sidewayshighways@yall.theatl.social
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        2 years ago

        M night shyamalans epic sci fi Mel Gibson movie of the year 1965

    • Stoneykins [any]@mander.xyz
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      2 years ago

      Timmy already made the wish for caffeine and we are just unaware that our reality was changed from one where coffee was illegal

      • tfw_no_toiletpaper@feddit.de
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        2 years ago

        Coffee doesn’t get rid of my teeth tho

        • Stoneykins [any]@mander.xyz
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          2 years ago

          Neither does weed but that’s illegal. And, drinking too much alcohol destroys your body and kills you. The legality of a substance doesn’t really align with what things are healthy and safe to consume.

          • theangryseal@lemmy.world
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            2 years ago

            I don’t know how something that dry your eating hole out would be good for your grill.

            I mean, I’m not a grill scientist. I could be wrong.

            • Stoneykins [any]@mander.xyz
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              2 years ago

              Did you have a stroke or am I having a stroke?

              I read this 50 times and I’m still not sure what you just said, could you rephrase it please?

    • newIdentity@sh.itjust.works
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      2 years ago

      Actually no, because it takes a lot of space to plant coca plants. We don’t have enough space for everyone to constantly have crack cocain

      • SatansMaggotyCumFart@lemmy.world
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        2 years ago

        Vertically stacked coca farm skyscrapers my dude.

      • havokdj@lemmy.world
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        2 years ago

        Yeah we do brother, crack cocaine actually takes less coke to make than regular coke, because you get 8x as much from the cocaine.

        7 parts baking soda to 1 part cocaine = 1 gram of coke turns into 8 grams of crack.

        Remember federal agent who may be watching, Master P taught me this, not living in a ghetto that you created.

        • newIdentity@sh.itjust.works
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          2 years ago

          But it also lasts shorter so we also need more of it

          • havokdj@lemmy.world
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            2 years ago

            Yeah, like a third shorter. If that is a concern, stick it in your gums because it’ll last like an hour then

        • frippa@lemmy.ml
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          2 years ago

          7 parts baking soda to 1 part coke is straight up criminal, it’s a highway robbery if they want me to pay something, the mix should be 1:1

          I know this for… Reasons

          (but fr I don’t sell Crack cocaine)

      • Dharma Curious@startrek.website
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        2 years ago

        Fair point

    • TotallyNotSpez@lemm.ee
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      2 years ago

      Ah yes, the Futurama Crack Mansion!

    • Promethiel@lemmy.world
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      2 years ago

      Without a cure for ADHD this is actually free healthcare woo!!!

    • ILikeBoobies@lemmy.ca
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      2 years ago

      It would be like China during the Opium Wars

  • Bizarroland@kbin.social
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    2 years ago

    See I wouldn’t be addicted to crack if it weren’t for those fairy godparents!

    • TurboDiesel@lemmy.world
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      2 years ago

      I heard this in Crocker’s voice

      • PopcornPrincess@lemmy.world
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        2 years ago

        FAIRIES! 0.o

  • Pinklink@lemm.ee
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    2 years ago

    He just doesn’t want to be the only one anymore

    • frippa@lemmy.ml
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      2 years ago

      deleted by creator

  • not_that_guy05@lemmy.world
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    2 years ago

    Wait was Reagan…Timmy before growing up?

    • The Picard Maneuver@startrek.websiteOPM
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      2 years ago

      No, these were his later years as president. Or at least how he remembers them.

  • Xusontha@ls.buckodr.ink
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    2 years ago

    • burgersc12@sh.itjust.works
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      2 years ago

      Fuck, its moving!

  • newIdentity@sh.itjust.works
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    2 years ago

    CocaCola puts the coca back into its drinks

  • Guy Ingonito@reddthat.com
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    2 years ago

    Does nothing unless you know it’s crack you need. Otherwise we’d just think we had a bad Covid-19 case.

    • XEAL@lemm.ee
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      2 years ago

      Almost everyone would have withdrawal syndrome, it would be fun

      • DragonTypeWyvern@literature.cafe
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        2 years ago

        Honestly, other than all the recovering addicts getting screwed over a lot of people would learn real quick not to be so judgemental.

        • XEAL@lemm.ee
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          2 years ago

          It’s good to teach empathy, but not in such extreme way…

  • Striker@lemmy.worldM
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    2 years ago

    It would be the same as it is now except crack/powdered cocaine would substitute sugar.

    • jscummy@sh.itjust.works
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      2 years ago

      Because crack and sugar are interchangeable, and sugar addiction/comedowns are definitely as bad as with cocaine

  • Cold_Brew_Enema@lemmy.world
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    2 years ago

    Doesn’t this go against “Da Rules?”

    • camr_on@lemmy.world
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      2 years ago

      It goes into effect for 10 minutes before the fairy swat team rolls up. Or something like that, it’s been a long time since I watched this

      • Hudomi@lemmy.world
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        2 years ago

        They’ll be too busy smoking crack to bother

  • Pika@sh.itjust.works
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    Cosmos would do it then Wanda would be like COSMO WTF

  • Agent641@lemmy.world
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    2 years ago

    Its just so moreish

  • postmateDumbass@lemmy.world
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    2 years ago

    WKUK Genie

    • PipedLinkBotB
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      2 years ago

      Here is an alternative Piped link(s):

      WKUK Genie

      Piped is a privacy-respecting open-source alternative frontend to YouTube.

      I’m open-source; check me out at GitHub.

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