At some point parents just say, “Fuck it. Want to fall on your head? That’s you.”
How did that even happen? It looks like some invisible force yeeted the baby to the side?
Have you met babies? They are eating, pooping, suicide machines.
It sure seems that way! Have you heard of that game where you have to constant try to prevent the baby from suiciding lol??
Yeah I lived through that simulation with my daughter up to age 3.
Edit: loved to lived
I hope she grew out of it after age 3, and didn’t just like… win the game.
She grew out of it! My comment was kind of ominous now that I look back on it, haha!
Best is when you’re holding with two hands/arms and you take the top one away for one second and that’s when they decide to go for a gold medal landing.
Can you blame them? Two people decide to fuck each other and then a whole-ass new person has to work and pay taxes and suffer for 80 years? I’m still not over it.
The smart ones off themselves by age 5!
In a fit of rage, she threw her self back in preparation for a rolling tantrum without anything to catch her.
It’s like a toddlers oldest instinct, just flex all of the back muscles and fly backwards. I’d be sitting on the floor with my son, tell him to stop throwing toys, boom, head hits the floor.
Toddler Crackhead Energy +physics. She flexed her back pretty suddenly. Toddlers are pretty top heavy, and that arm rest is kinda rounded, so… flop, thunk.
The momentum kept the head out of harm’s way, though, so that’s nice.
This is some proper: fuck you, I’ll do what I want behaviour!
I work at a daycare. Today I had to write an incident report about a kid who tantrumed so hard she hurt herself. The little dipshit reacted to me telling her she can’t drink window cleaner by ragdolling with enough force to leave a bruise on her forehead. Her mom did not seem surprised when she heard what happened.
Stg children will actively try to kill themselves over nothing.
Either his wife is black or bro got cucked
Imagine even thinking this, let alone saying it. Paris would melt your tiny racist brain, you fuckin degenerate
Geez buddy I’m sorry you got cheated on and left to raise another man’s kid
I’m sorry you don’t understand genetics enough to know that’s not the only way you could end up with kids who don’t look like yourself. Or are totally ignorant of adoption.
🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
My wife and I made a conscious decision never to have kids.
A) Because it’s the most environmentally damaging thing you can do and
B) If they were starved of oxygen at birth, then inhaled too many traffic fumes, they’d post comments like your infantile gobshite
I feel like I’m speaking to ChatGPT doing an impersonation of a stereotypical aging white redditor
Dude. You can’t win this one. Just do what normal people do and take the loss and move on with your life.
And what exactly do I lose? The approval of some miserable fuck who I would never want to associate with anyways? Like I give a fuck about a few downvotes from a pile of cucks
Also you telling me to move on is rich considering you’re replying to a 4 day old comment
